Timing is Everything.....Or Not.....

Our life A.T.A. (after Turner's arrival) is a series of sequencing and timing. And like all other parents of infants, our life is dictated by feeding and napping, and everything else forms into and around those two major daily events. Although Jason and I are "go with the flow" type of parents, we make daily attempts and have hopeful wishing that we get the timing just right. When the timing is right, it leads to a harmonious flow where Turner is beaming with smiles and curiosity while we play or venture out. When the timing is a bit off, we embrace our situation as an impromptu baby adventure, and we make a great effort to let creativity and openness rule the circumstance. Timing is everything, right? Isn't suppose to be about being in the right place at the right time? Well...when you have a baby and your in the "place" and it's the "time", you really have no choice but to dive in head first - trust your instincts - because it's "now" time.

Barra has presented us with some timing triumphs and some challenges. Most people here run on "Mexican time", which means anything goes, show up "around" the time you were suppose to and oh yeah....there is no such thing as a quick meal. There is no point in worrying about it too much - nobody else does - and remember you are in Mexico - the land of mañana; What you didn't get to today, you can do tomorrow, and what was suppose to happen an hour ago, well....would it really be so bad if it happened in another hour or so? And what you think will only take a an hour may very well turn into a few hour excursion. In my experience, Mexican culture (at least here in Barra) is not a culture of "now", rather it is a refreshing culture where the pace of life is comfortably slow and where it seems everybody is thinking "let's take our time and see". So, in a place like Barra where time rolls like the gentle waves in the bay, is timing really everything, or just is it just an afterthought?

When the timing is harmonious.....

Every morning around 6 or 6:30 before daybreak has happened, I am woken by little wiggles and gentle coos of the little warm body at my side. Turner is up, which means he is ready to nurse. We nurse and cuddle for a little while, and soon after Jason gets out of bed and whisks Turner off to change his diaper and have a morning play session. I will usually stay in bed to steal some extra sleep, but on this particular morning we were all up and energized while it was still dark, and we decided to sit out on the top deck and enjoy the sunrise.

Baby fed - check. Clean diaper - check. Smiling baby - check. Coffee - check. Clear skies - check. The perfect timing to watch the bright sunrise with the family - double check.

The sun beginning to peak over the mountains, the palm trees and then the other boats in the marina.

The beautiful orange, yellow glow that is cast on the hotel during sunrise. 

My boys!! 

Watching the sunrise together.

I suppose Turner looks more interested in something he sees on the floor.

All parents know that moment each evening when the little one/s has just fallen asleep, it's quite and you look at each other with tired eyes and give a weary smile. Whether it has been a really good, successful day or a more difficult day - it was no doubt a busy one - and it is now time to unwind and relax together. Each evening here on the West Star, that moment is so rewarding. As Jason and I have some time together we find ourselves engaged in deep conversation, or we just enjoy each others company as we watch a movie or listen to some music.

Several nights ago, after Turner had been asleep for about an hour, we were startled by the loud boom of fireworks. We both rushed to check on our sleeping babe. Luckily we found him undisturbed as he was obviously fulfilled from a day packed with plenty of attention. We decided to take the chance that he would remained fast asleep and we headed for the top deck to enjoy the remainder of the show. As we stood their embraced and watching the fireworks that were bursting just beyond the palm trees and over the towers of the hotel, I couldn't help but feel grateful that the timing was perfect for Jason and I to have this simple moment together. The day fulfilled us a family and now the evening fulfilled us a couple.

The hotel at night - the stage for the firework show we saw. 

When timing calls for an impromptu baby adventure.....

One of the perks of breastfeeding is that it can be done anywhere at anytime, and when it is done discreetly, people don't even notice what is going on - or at least they're pretending not to notice. I, as I am sure most mothers, prefer to nurse in a quite, familiar and comfortable place. But let's face it, if you want to get out of the house for longer than an hour, you have to be willing and prepared to nurse where your baby needs you to. You can try to time it, and believe me I do sometimes, but babies will always eat just as much as they want and when they want. Think about it - sometimes you are just a bit thirsty, or you just want a small bite to eat, or sometimes you're ready to down a big old meal. It's the same for babies. So, here in Barra, I am learning that it's not so much about the timing. Rather, it is more about reading Turner's signs and understanding that his nursing needs have shifted according to the shift in climate (I find that he is thirstier in the heat), his growth and the pace of our days. As a result, I've found myself nursing in couple of peculiar spots and situations where the timing doesn't seem ideal, but Turner is getting what he needs and I choose to look at it as a little adventure.

We had an ideal morning and early afternoon (harmonious timing). We had great breakfast in town, where Turner quietly concentrated on and played with the soccer ball hanging on his stroller. Jason watched and played with Turner as I went to a yoga class, and then we spent some time at the home of a couple and their visiting niece and grand-nephew that we have befriended. Turner nursed after our breakfast, nursed after the yoga class, napped as we walked to our friends' house - he was in a good mood, up for anything and we were beaming parents as we toted him around town. On our way back to the dingy, in which Jason would take us across the lagoon and back to the yacht, it was a bit later than we had planned for and Turner started to so show the signs that he was getting hungry and sleepy. I knew we were pushing it, but the yacht was just a short dingy ride away and I thought, "He can make it".

I was wrong. When going across the lagoon, boats are allowed to go at a faster speed. But upon entering the marina, boats must slow down to a speed where they are not creating a wake. Turner enjoys the speed when we zip across the lagoon. He usually puts his little arms up and his lips form a little O shape. On this particular trip, as soon as we began to enter the marina and the dingy slowed down, my happy, content baby begin to scream. Cuddles and kisses were not going to cut it - this boy wanted to eat and he wanted to eat now!  The last thing we wanted was to cruise through the marina with a screaming baby. The West Star is all the way toward the front of the marina and it was the middle of the day, so people were out working on their boats. I was thinking to myself, "Am I going to have to feed him right here, right now?" Jason quickly turned the dingy around and we started cruising around the lagoon in hopes that the speed would distract Turner. Wrong again. There I was in mid-cruise with the wind whipping through my hair and feeling safe to do so, so I grabbed a blanket, got Turner in position, covered us both and let Turner go to town. After several minutes where Jason continued to make circles in the lagoon, where Turner was peacefully eating and where I was concentrating on holding tight to my baby and staying somewhat relaxed - we finally felt confident to enter the marina and then we slowly made our way to the yacht. The sight of a mother nursing her baby on a dingy got us a couple of interesting looks in the marina, but we just smiled and waved. I stepped off the dingy and on the the dock that afternoon thinking, "Well...that was a different way to do it" But, when Turner gave me that huge, satisfied smile that I love, I knew that I would do it again if he needed.

It would seem that the timing wasn't perfect, but really it was just a bit inconvenient and perhaps unusual. But for Turner the timing was perfect as he wasn't denied what he needed, and in the end two parents learned the continuing lesson that parenthood means adaptability.

The dingy (AKA - Turner's Cafe Leche). 

Notice all the baby stuff?

Another example of nursing on the fly with nice scenery.